To Love Black
by PurpleAjah
Summary: When Haru goes Black, and doesn’t seem to be able to turn black, will Yuki be able to cope with it? Or will Black have an effect on Yuki that White never could – would Yuki fall in love with him? Shounenai. Oneshot


**DISCLAIMER: **I don't own it

((A/N Ok, warning first: **WARNING:Shounen-ai, and lots of Black Haru, plus I'm trying something new here** Yes. I be trying 'drama' -says the word slowly- Ok then, this one-shot is for Dyeh because she wanted Black Haru/Yuki. Squee! It is my longest chapter ever!))

**To Love Black**

Isn't it funny how some days everything seems to go right, where-as other days _nothing_ does? Haru had been having one of them days. Actually, more like one of those weeks. Or months. It wasn't that anything went wrong… It was more like there wasn't anything to go wrong. There wasn't any excitement, nothing to make mistakes about, nothing to do perfectly. And in Haru's opinion, it could not be worse. This quiet was boring, and made him restless. He could have coped with everything going wrong, everything going right would be great! But this empty nothingness was something Haru simply could not cope with.

If nothing happened soon, then Haru would surely crack.

- - - - -

Yuki had been having a wonderful month. Everything was taken care of, everything had been organised, he didn't have to do anything by lay back and watch the world work itself out. He did not particularly care that he was not doing anything. It was… relaxing. And Yuki would do anything to make it stay that way for as long as possible, even if it messed up his own feeling of serenity, just for a while.

- - - - -

Haru was sure that everyone else felt the same way that everyone else was - itching for something to happen. How boring is a world in which nothing happens? How can people stand it? True, things were probably happening all around the world, but where _he_ lived nothing was happening. Haru would just have to liven up the atmosphere himself if things did not pick up.

…Probably not even though any fault of his own. After all, even though cows have a reputation for being quiet and calm, Haru's own personality clashed with the spirit of the cow, all his pent up emotions that the spirit attempted to smother, but only ended up producing an almost chemical reaction – otherwise known as Black Haru.

Haru, had he not been smothered by the spirit of the cow, would be restless at the lack of excitement. The spirit of the cow clashing with those fundamental emotions produces a more concentrated anger, the uncontrollable anger of Haru's 'Black' side. It is fortunate that, except when he gets mad or restless, Haru is a good natured person, so the spirit's influence over Haru is limited at these times to simply presenting a completely placid nature.

But as Haru was not feeling calm and easy going, and the chaos that this restlessness he was feeling clashing with the determinedly tranquil spirit of the cow was slowly building in the white haired boy. A normal person with this amount of pressure inside them would slowly go mad, but Haru would take the more intense version of madness for him, and go Black. That was the difference between him and everyone else. In many ways, Haru was grateful of Black simply because it was a 'safe' outlet for his pent up emotions – he never remembered anything of what he did when he was Black. So he was therefore _innocent_ of all he says or does when the boy Haru and the spirit of the cow, when forced together, produce something that is not either of them – that is purely uncontrollable madness.

0 0 0 0 0

Yuki looked sidewards at Haru. The younger teenager had seemed out of it for days – now that he thought of it. Maybe something was bothering him? After a bit of thought, Yuki walked over to talk to him.

"Hey, Haru? Are you feeling alright? You seem a bit preoccupied."

"Wha-? Sorry, what did you say?"

"You don't feel sick or anything, do you?"

"Oh… no. I'm not sick."

"Ok then." Yuki walked out of the room. Haru snapped; the change from White to Black was almost audible.

_How could Yuki notice that I was so distant, but believe me when I said that everything was alright? Ha, well I'm feeling great now! Maybe I should show him how good I'm feeling now…?_

Haru got up and called to Yuki to come back, "Oi, rat! Where do you think you are going?"

Yuki turned around to look at Haru, "Sorry? I was going to my next class. You should be too." He continued to walk down the hallway.

"What if I didn't _want_ to go to class, Yuki? What if I felt in a mood to teach, not to learn?"

Yuki rolled his eyes, "Haru, what exactly would you know that someone else might not? Just go to class…"

Haru closed the distance between himself and Yuki… quite thoroughly. Yuki gasped as Haru suddenly seemed to be all over his skin – too close.

"I'm sure I know a lot more things then you do, Yuki. Though it really depends on which way you look at it."

Yuki realised that he was slowly backing up; he would be trapped! Trying to keep from relax his slightly panicked breathing, Yuki slipped out of Haru's grip and quickly moved away. "What was that! You know, Black, you are really tiresome at times. Why don't you just leave us and keep the peace?"

"Maybe I don't like peace." Before Yuki could react, Black stole a kiss and swaggered over to his classroom.

- - - - -

"Haru! Why are you late?"

"What's it to you?" Haru didn't bother to sit down, just leaned against the closed door.

"Don't be rude! You will tell me a reasonable explanation for why you are late, or I'll send you to the principal's office!"

Haru inspected his nails for dirt, "Oh yea? What if I told you I was attempting to molest my cousin? Is that a 'viable' reason?"

- - - - -

Haru was lazing over a chair on the other side of the desk to the principle.

"I'm going to have to call your parents, Haru. This immaturity has got to stop. You are disrupting the rest of the students."

Grey eyes looked disregarding up and down the principle, "Oh? Well, I would include you in the action, but you would probably lessen the excitement, not encourage it."

The principle ignored him, "You told your teacher you were 'attempting to molest' your cousin. Which cousin would that be?" _Honestly_, the principle thought, _there are too many Sohma's at this school._

"Do I have to choose?" Haru replied insolently. "All my relatives are so hot… To bad _you_ weren't born a Sohma."

- - - - -

_Knock, knock, knock_

"Who is it and what did you want?"

"…Um, Haru? It is Kisa… c-can I come in? Please?" Haru opened his door for her. "Thank-you." Haru invited her to sit on his bed, and then sat beside her. "Haru, I heard you got sent to the principle's office today. What did you do?"

"You want me to show you?" Haru pushed Kisa onto the bed and leaned over her, "How is it _your_ business anyway?"

"Haru, stop it! You're scaring me!" Kisa was crying.

"Why should I?" His hand was on her leg, "You asked for it-"

"Haru! Stop that right now!" Hatori had just came into the room and pulled Haru off Kisa, who quickly scrambled away.

"What'cha do that for!" Haru put his fists up, "Wanna' fight!"

Hatori slapped Haru soundly, leaving the boy's cheek red and stinging. "Control yourself Haru. She is a child."

Black Haru quickly got over the indignity of being slapped open handed by the doctor, "So I should pick someone older? Is that what you are saying?" Haru leered up at Hatori.

The dragon's hand again lashed out, but Haru caught it, pulling the doctor close. "Oh, so you want it rough, do ya'? Well I can do rough-" Hatori slapped Haru with his other hand, leaving Haru with two red marks on his cheeks.

"Maybe that will teach you not to mess with people," Hatori said, his voice steady as he straightened his suit.

"Not really." Black lazed back, his shoulders against the wall, head lolling to one side. His lazy position contrasted with his eyes, which glared at Hatori with hatred.

Taken aback, Hatori asked, "You're still Black?" Then with more concern, "Haru, snap out of it. What has gotten you so… aggressive? You don't usually stay Black for so long."

Haru's lip curled, "It's not like _you_ care."

"I do care about you, Haru. I care even when you aren't yourself. Haru, if you don't control yourself you will ruin your life, and make other's miserable at the same time. Do you really want that?" After a searching look, Hatori walked out of the room.

_What does he mean by that? He probably just means to try and make me White again. But why would I want that? Being Black is so much more exiting._

- - - - -

It was a Saturday, thus there wasn't any school to worry about. Yuki was in his garden, but Tohru was not with him as she had gone back to the house earlier to make lunch. Just finished watering the last plant, Yuki turned around at the sound of leaves crunching under someone's feet.

"Yuki?" The boy in question dropped his smile as he recognised Haru's voice, not Tohru's.

"Hello Haru. Why are you here?"

"Because you are. You know, it is a really girlish pastime to keep a garden." Yuki had tuned back to his plants, but whipped back around at this comment. Haru was leaning against a tree, smirking.

"It is not a girlish pastime! Maybe I like to garden." Yuki said righteously.

"You know I'm Black still, don't you? And," here Haru looked around, "We are all alone. You can be as girly as you want, because even if you weren't, I would still top you."

_What? He is still Black? …Typical. I don't want to put up with this._

"Bother someone else; I'm busy." Unfortunately, when he finished saying that, Tohru walked back into the clearing.

"I'm back again, Yuki-kun! Oh, I didn't know you were here Haru-kun! Are you staying for lunch? Oh no! I only cooked enough for four people… I'm so sorry Haru-kun! I'll make more!" Haru ignored her and raised an eyebrow at Yuki, who shook his head back at him.

"Miss. Honda, Haru will not be staying for lunch. Go back to the house now, I'll be there soon." Tohru obediently went back.

"My, my, Yuki. Self sacrifice?" There was an underlying sarcastic tone to Haru's voice that Yuki did not like.

"I will not let you touch Miss. Honda."

"Oh? Will you 'let' me touch you then? Or must I /do it/ without your consent?"

Yuki was getting slightly angry at Haru, but… he almost liked Haru like this. He wasn't all 'love-y dove-y' like… he talked to Yuki like a person, not a porcelain figure. And the absence of all the 'Yuki I love you!' comments randomly thrown into the conversation was a relief.

"You won't /do it/ at all, Haru. Defiantly not with me."

"And why not?"

"Why must I give a reason?"

"Well-" Haru slowly walked towards Yuki, making sure the other boy saw his approach, and had a chance to move if he wanted. Yuki started to, but stopped himself stubbornly. "Well, I don't suppose it does matter. It would just be more enjoyable for you if you said 'yes'. He tipped Yuki's chin and kissed the other, not gently like White would (so Yuki imagined), but callously as Black. It left Yuki red cheeked and panting for breath.

Yuki liked it.

He liked the way Haru did not hesitate, did not wait for his permission, like he would have had he not been Black. He liked the kiss itself, and the way it made him feel. It was dominating, and gave Yuki a chance to fight back… _encouraged_ Yuki to fight back, to try and win. Anything less would have left the purple head unsatisfied.

"So what about now? Will you give your insignificant 'consent' now?" Haru was pressing his advantage, and his hands had found their way past the material of Yuki's shirt without Yuki realising it. Yuki was tempted to give in, but pushed back.

"Ha! I would be weak if I gave in so easily."

Surprisingly, Haru grinned, "True. You wouldn't be who I think you are if you gave up so easily."

Yuki blushed slightly, glad that he had chosen an answer Haru approved of- _wait, why do I care what Haru thinks anyway?_ But despite himself, Yuki was enjoying this.

- - - - -

Black ended up staying for lunch anyway, which was fine, because Tohru ended up making lunch for him anyway, after Yuki had told her to go back.

But since Kyo is incapable of _not_ picking fights when Black Haru is around, lunch was delayed.

"What do you mean I'm a (A/N tempted to write 'fat-head' here That is Dyeh's influence) stupid cow? You want to fight!" Haru yelled at Kyo.

"I do want to fight! I'm just not sure if you are worth fighting!"

"You were the one who couldn't come up with any other name then 'stupid cow', you stupid cat!"

Yuki sweat dropped in the background, asking Tohru, "What was that about? He just contradicted himself."

They exchanged a few blows and Haru ended up on the ground, with Kyo on top of him. "Common'! You offend me when you don't even try to beat me!"

Yuki commented again to Tohru, "Doesn't Kyo even realise that is why Haru does it? Honestly…"

"Ha! Wise words, Yuki." Yuki blinked – he had not realised he had been talking loud enough for Haru to hear. "But that isn't the only reason…" He smirked up at Kyo, who was now sitting on him, kneeling with a leg either side of Haru. "I kinda like compromising positions like this too," Haru's hands trailed up Kyo's thighs as he said this.

Kyo yelped and jumped off Haru. "WHAT THE HELL-! WHAT WAS THAT ABOUT HARU!"

Shigure was laughing his head off while Haru dusted himself off. Nobody bothered to answer Tohru's question of what was going on.

"Haru got you one that time Kyo," Yuki chuckled. "At least _I_ wouldn't have jumped like a girl!"

Haru looked at Yuki considering, "Willing to bet?"

"Yea I'm willing to bet," Yuki looked almost seductively at Haru from behind his eye lashes. "What have you got to bet with though?"

Kyo, looking disgusted, said, "Yuki is as girly as they come – of course he would."

"…I'm not girly!"

"Pretty pathetic, Yuki. You sound just like a girl when you say it like that." Kyo laughed at Haru's comment. Yuki's eyebrows snapped together, but in the back of his mind he was thinking, _White Haru would never go out of his way like that to offend me... but do I hate it if he does whilst Black? And Haru didn't defend me like he usually would as well._

"Not so sure of yourself now, eh Yuki? Without Haru on your side," Kyo chuckled. Yuki simply got up and left.

- - - - -

Black Haru found him in his room later on. "What's up, Yuki?" He lay down on Yuki's bed, putting his feet up on the bed head. Yuki moved from sitting on his bed to the chair. "Why did ya' move? Jeez… you aren't _still_ sulking over lunch, are you?"

Yuki punched Haru, but the teenager simply rolled over on the bed, dodging the fist. The softness of the mattress muddled Yuki's sense of balance, and he toppled onto Haru, landing close to the position Kyo was in before. Haru leered at Yuki's blush when he also remembered.

"Oh, so you remember the insults, _and_ the bet, do you? Still so self-assured? Still think you can win?" Haru didn't wait for an answer from Yuki, his hands almost to Yuki's hips. But instead of squealing, Yuki leaned into the touch, his lips meeting Haru's.

It was then that Haru's emotions changed from restless to triumphant, then content at his victory – Haru snapped back to White. Yuki realised it straight away; saw the confused expression on Haru's face, and the felt the way his hands suddenly froze.

Yuki was disappointed and saddened at the change. _I have fallen in love with Black Haru_, he realised, _I do not love White. I love Black's excitement, his dominance, the way he treats me as myself and doesn't worry about my feelings as if I can't take care of myself… But I don't love Haru – I don't love White Haru._

It was slightly bittersweet for Yuki to get off Haru and straighten his cloths before walking out of his room, leaving the kind-heartened cow on his bed. Because Haru had two sides… and Yuki only loved one of them.


End file.
